How To Write a Book - Without Doing Any Work!

A Literal Literary Loser Lets You in on a Secret

As a member of multiple social media writing support groups, I encounter post after post of people pleading for help with writer’s block, story ideas, plot and character suggestions.

I confess: I don’t get it. For me, writing is a compulsion. I am compelled to do it, often at the expense of everything else. (If you saw the haphazard — i.e. messy — state of my house, you’d know what the first thing I sacrifice is to get in just a few more minutes of writing time.)

If you don’t feel driven to write, why would you bother doing it? It’s not like it’s a great way to make money!

But, different strokes for different folks and all that jazz. I accept that there are people who want to write a book — but they don’t want to do the actual writing part.

Have I got a solution for you!

The secret to writing a book without doing any work is to… get other people to write it for you!

I don’t mean ghostwriters. Ghostwriters cost money. And you know how averse I am to spending any money to publish.

Here’s the hack I’m talking about:

Back in 2011, I self-published a book called “Soap Opera 451: A Time Capsule of Daytime Drama’s Greatest Moments.” I’m the author of record. But you know who actually wrote it?

The soap opera actors, writers, producers, directors and journalists whom I asked to contribute their behind-the-scenes memories of how these greatest scenes came together.

And who picked these greatest scenes? The soap opera fans who wrote me about their favorites.

So I didn’t select the scenes, and I didn’t write the memories. And still, at the end, there was a book! How deviously clever am I?

Now, thirteen years later, “Soap Opera 451: A Time Capsule of Daytime Drama’s Greatest Moments,” previously only an ebook, will be published as a paper and hardback by BearManor Media.

It will feature 20% new material. But I’m not going to be the one to write it.

You will.

I want you to write me at oakdaleconfidential@gmail.com (yes, that is the name of the bestselling tie-in book I wrote for As the World Turns) and share with me the scenes you believe were the best of all time. They can be from any show, they can be from any time period. Just tell me what the scene was, and why it deserves to be included in this time capsule.

For the scenes which get the most votes, I’ll go to the creators and ask them how those moments happened.

Here are some examples of past entries:

Hilary B. Smith (One Life to Live)

Julia Barr (All My Children)

Eileen Davidson (Days of our Lives)

Linda Dano (Another World)

Head writer Thom Racina (General Hospital)

Writer Susan Dansby (As the World Turns)

So what are you waiting for, soap fans? Time for you — I mean, uhm, me — to write another best-seller!

Describe your favorite soap moments, then I’ll interview the folks who made them happen, type them up, organize them, introduce them, explain where the participants are now, work with the publisher on the cover and layout, and tirelessly promote the book on social media and beyond — without doing any writing at all.

Easy, right?

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So while I do no writing work, please enjoy this flashback to my daughter and I reading and discussing our latest book on Youtube: