Why I Know I'm Not Good Enough To Self-Publish

A Literal Literary Loser Gets Real

Ever since I started this chronicle of trying to get back in the publishing game after losing both my agent and my editor, the most consistent piece of advice I’ve received is, “Why don’t you just self-publish? It’s so easy!”

Yes, I could self-publish. No, it’s not so easy.

I’ve self-published before. Two of my titles, “Getting Into NYC Kindergarten” and “Getting Into NYC High School,” are non-fiction.

They were not easy to publish. First, there was the simple, technical side of it. The formatting, the links, the spacing. You can hire someone to do that. But it’s not cheap. Luckily, I was able to get it for free. I sleep with my IT guy. (It’s OK, we’re married.)

And the time I spend promoting those books through podcasts, YouTube videos, articles, and workshops is basically a part-time job. Not so easy.

I also got the rights back to my traditionally published Figure Skating Mystery series. I added videos from The Ice Theatre of NY to enhance the story. My handy IT guy took care of that, as well.

For non-fiction, as long as you know what facts you’re trying to convey and who desperately needs to hear them, you can get away with a less than sparking narrative.

Fiction is harder. For fiction, you need an editor. Not just to check your spelling and your grammar and your syntax and to take out the typos, but to let you know whether the story you’re telling makes any sense. And whether it’s moving. And whether it’s engaging. And whether anyone would want to read it.

The Figure Skating mysteries had already been looked over by an editor at Berkley Prime Crime before they were published in paperback. So I felt confident re-releasing them as e-books. If she’d thought they were good enough, I had to trust that they were.

With the novel I’m working on now, I can’t assume that. I need an editor to give me an honest assessment of what I’ve written. And then I need them to work with me to make it better.

“You can hire someone for that!” The self-publishing enthusiasts assure me.

Yes. I could hire them. But how do I know I can trust them?

An editor that I hire gets paid whether the book I release is good or not. Whether it’s read or not. Whether it sells or not.

Even the most scrupulously honest editor-for-hire is simply giving me their opinion. And we’ve all heard stories of books turned down by dozens of publishers based on personal opinion, only to be picked up by a publisher based on personal opinion… and either go on to become a best-seller, or flop like all the previous publishers expected.

An editor who is hired to edit by the writer produces a manuscript they (and hopefully the writer) like. But there’s no consequences for them if no one else does. Nothing hinges on whether or not they did a good job… for the editor.

I don’t trust my personal opinion enough to go it alone. I don’t trust the opinion of one editor with no stake in the outcome enough to go it alone.

What I am looking for is an editor who has as much to lose from the book not being everything it could be as I do. I am looking for an editor who has as much to gain from the book being as good as it could be as I do.

I am looking for an editor who is willing to take the leap of faith with me.

Because I know I’m not good enough to take that leap on my own.